


When I Look At You

by mtac_archivist



Category: NCIS
Genre: Drama, Gen, Not Episode Related, Not a Crossover
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-15
Updated: 2007-12-15
Packaged: 2019-03-02 06:08:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 527
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13312095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mtac_archivist/pseuds/mtac_archivist
Summary: Sometimes you can see things by simply looking at someone.





	When I Look At You

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Jessi, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [ MTAC](https://fanlore.org/wiki/MTAC), an archive of NCIS fanfiction which closed in 2017. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after August 2017. I tried to reach out to all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator (and this work is still attached to the archivist account), please contact me using the e-mail address on [ the MTAC collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/mtac/profile)

  
Author's notes: Just something I\'ve been writing down yesterday while being kinda depressed. There are no names mentioned in the story. I\'ve been thinking about Gibbs and Tony when I wrote it but it could be everyone, really.  


* * *

When I look at you

 

When I look at you I see why people believe in the good of humans.

When I look at you I see it in you.

 

I see the smiles and the laughter. I see the jokes and the humor in your eyes. I see the enthusiasm and encouragement when you enlighten the mood of everyone else. I see the passion in your work – so, it may look like goofing around to others but I know it’s not. It’s passion. And all the happiness is a part of it, even though this is a serious job. I can see it. In your eyes. In your actions. In your heart.

 

When I look at you I see every bit of what I’m not capable of. Not anymore. Not again.

When I look at you I see that you believe in the good of humans.

 

You are in love with life. You see the good things, although you are always confronted with the worst things of life. You see the good side in people, believing in what you see. What you feel. You joke because you know that it makes people laugh more. Even if it doesn’t seem so. You are enthusiastic because you want to contaminate others with your joy. And you are able to do it.

 

When I look at you I see all that.

When I look at you I see it in you.

 

But most of all I see how much you care. You give a god damn fuck about people. You can’t see them down. You want to see people smile. You want them to laugh. To forget about all the grief they are in. You want to make them feel wanted. You do make them feel wanted. You care about them even though you don’t know them. You are always there when someone needs you.  
You are there. Sometimes joking to make them laugh. Sometimes simply sharing moments. Moments of support. Listening even though no word is said.

 

But when I look at you I also see that there is something else.

When I look at you I sometimes see a hint of sad disbelief.

 

I see disbelief where it doesn’t belong. As if you haven’t always believed in the good of humans. As if you haven’t always been the optimistic guy you are now. As if you aren’t all optimistic even today. The sadness a hint of why that might be. Maybe, because you want to see the good in people but can’t. You can’t because something has gone wrong in your early life that I’m not able to figure out by simply seeing.

 

When I look at you I see that there are good people.

But when I look at you I see that there are still too many people who can’t be classified as good.

 

~Fin

 

Please tell me what you think. Reviews are always appreciated :)


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